Feeleez Matching Game
Simple game play — makes it easy for parents to help their children process feelings without having to decipher complicated rules and instructions.
Hand-drawn images — are engaging for all kids, and ideal for kids on the spectrum.
Expressive images — provide kids with an emotional bridge that allows them to offload festering emotions and build connection with caregivers.
Unlabeled images — make for open-ended conversations and allow children to connect with an image without worrying about “getting it wrong”.
Emotion-based play — allows kids to receive emotional support, paving the way for advanced brain development, accelerated executive brain processing, and higher emotional intelligence
Image-based play — makes the game accessible and enjoyable in any language
Diverse imagery — makes game inclusive and inviting to all cultures and genders
Sturdy, big pieces — makes emotional learning and processing available to even the youngest children
Soy-based ink — is good for the environment and safe for kids
Let’s play the game with Kelly!
Kelly overheard a person at school talking about her and saying “mean” things. She tried to be extra friendly to the girl during lunch, but she doesn’t think it worked because she wasn’t invited to play in the game at recess. Instead Kelly went back into the classroom and played by herself.
What makes matters worse is that there is a birthday party today and that particular girl is going to be there. Kelly is pretty sure everyone there hates her and she doesn’t want to go. Kelly’s Dad gets out the Feeleez game and spreads all the cards out. He invites Kelly to play a game of memory.
Kelly and her Dad spread all the cards out, face down.
<—- They take turns flipping over two cards at a time, looking for pairs.
Kelly is the first to find a pair.
Dad: “What do you think that kid is feeling?”
Kelly: “He’s feeling brave and strong.”
Dad: “Oh? He’s feeling brave and strong? I wonder what was going on for him…”
Kelly: “Well, I think he’s not sure what it’s going to be like to go on the field trip, but he’s feeling brave about it.”
Dad: “I see.”
Dad finds the next pair.
Dad: “I found a pair! Oh wow. I think this person might be upset. It almost looks like she’s making fists and gritting her teeth.”
Kelly: “I think she’s super mad! Really, really mad!”
Dad: “Yeah, I’ve felt that way before. Have you ever felt this mad before?”
Kelly: “Oh yes! Remember when Alex threw my babydoll in the trash can? I felt so mad that day.”
Dad: “Oh yes, I do remember that. You felt so mad.”
Kelly: “I don’t like feeling that mad. It makes my head hurt.”
Dad: “I bet! That’s a really powerful feeling!”
Dad and Kelly continue to take turns.
Sometimes they find pairs and sometimes they don’t, but that’s ok. They continue to giggle, have fun, and talk about all the feelings they see on the cards. Dad makes sure to make lots of eye-contact and offer physical touch in the form of high fives and arm rubs so that Kelly feels safe expressing herself with him. He also let’s Kelly be the judge of what emotion each card is illustrating because there is no right or wrong answer when it comes to how she feels. Dad wants Kelly to tell him about her interpretation of each card because that will allow her to further develop her own emotional understanding and vocabulary.
Kelly finds her last pair.
When she picks up these cards, Kelly stares at them for a long time and her face becomes a little clouded.
Kelly: “Dad? This is how I felt when I heard that girl saying those mean things about me.”
Dad: “Oh yeah? You felt like the illustration on this card?'“
Kelly: “Uh huh. Just like this.”
Dad: “What is that feeling like?”
Kelly: “It’s very sad and droopy. I wanted to cry.”
Dad: “Oh. I bet. Darn it. Do you feel like crying now?”
Kelly: “A little.”
Dad: “Want me to hold you a while?”
Kelly: “Yes please.”
Kelly climbs in Dad’s lap and cries really hard. Dad rubs her back and makes murmurs of understanding. He waits several minutes for her to get all of her tears out. Eventually Kelly lifts her head up.
Dad: “How do you feel now, honey?”
Kelly: “Still a little sad.”
Dad: “Yeah. That was really hard to hear her say those things, hunh?”
Kelly: “Yeah... Dad?”
Dad: “Unh-hunh?”
Kelly: “I love you.”
Dad: “I love you, too, sweetie.”
Kelly: “You know what? There are going to be lots of kids at the party. I’m still sad, but I don’t want to miss out on playing with them.”
Dad: “You’re right. There will be many many friends at the party.”
Kelly: “I’m ready to go!”
Now that Kelly has gotten love and support around her feelings, she has access to the part of her brain that thinks logically and optimistically. Kelly has developed some resiliency.
Kelly